Some Psychology of High Heels

Thoughts on why women love TV doctors!

Why men and women snoop on each other!

Preventing Christmas party disasters!

You might feel the same with PMT as going through a breakup!

Huge and heavy handbags reflect the modern woman's psyche

Use your body language!

A few thoughts on self harm

A few thoughts on body image

Some Thoughts on Hiding Grief and Loss

QUIZ: How Superstitious Are You?

Coping With The So Very Modern Stress Of Technology!

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The Bluffer’s Guide To Wine Tasting

Seven Secrets Of A Winning Attitude

QUIZ: What Type of Gift Giver Are You?

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QUIZ: Are you OTT with OCD?

QUIZ: Sort Out the She-Devil in You (anger and stress advice)

Secrets Between Your Sheets - what your sleep positions mean!

Your height and implications for your life and personality

What Your Wallet Or Pocketbook Reveals About You!

OCD SOS: Help for your obsessive and compulsive behaviour!

Don't Take A Gamble With Gambling Online

Banish Panic Attacks

QUIZ: Don't Let Shyness Spoil Your Life!

How To Get A Heavenly Night’s Sleep

QUIZ: Are You A Spendaholic?

Spring Clean Your Life!

Stop Worrying And Start Living!

Unique Ways To Improve Your Intuition!

Dinner Party Gossip - The Good, The Bad and The Ugly!

The Definitive Guide to Spotting Lying & Dishonesty

Common Embarrassing Situations - And How To Negotiate Them!

Don't Bet On Gambling - It's A Mug's Game!

Give up your seat for pregnant women!

QUIZ: Gossip Girls - The Good, the Bad and the Ugly about Gossip

Make the most of those first few moments when you meet someone

What Your Hair Colour Tells People About Your Personality!

Make the most out of managing staff

Colour Therapy For Your Life!

The Good Complaining Guide

Secrets & Lies - The Body Language of Dishonesty


Some Thoughts on Hiding Grief and Loss


Some Thoughts on Hiding Grief and Loss

"It's surprising how many people harbour deep emotional grief over various life events. Many view them as "skeletons" in their cupboards and fear the reaction of others if they opened up about the event. For example, many women feel they couldn't possibly share with a partner it past abortion sexual assault."

What damage can be caused by hiding such pain?

"Some people are able to ‘compartmentalise’ hidden grief. It's like they close the door on it and then move on. However most people find it causes them a great deal of distress. Often this happens when something suddenly throws the memory of the event into their conscious mind and catches them unawares. This can cause much anxiety and upset. For others they have a constant sense that there's a stream of memories and attached feelings that ebb and flow out of their everyday life. In such cases they may experience chronic psychosomatic illness like frequent headaches, tummy aches, skin complaints and general stress and exhaustion. It takes a lot of emotional energy to contain all these feelings to yourself. They may also turn to drink or drugs in the long term to "medicate" difficult feelings."

How it can effect relationshps and what sort of knock-on effects can it have if you hide important things like grief or even regret over an abortion?

"There are many long-term effects of hidden grief on relationships. People will develop different "coping strategies" that protect them from really connecting with a partner friend or family. So, for example, they may be one of these people with a perpetual cheery smile who always smooth things over when inside they experience a lot of pain. But actually such coping strategies prevent them from having healthy relationships. If someone cannot share their pain from the past it usually means they won't share pain that occurs in the present. This prevents them from having genuinely emotionally intimate relationship where both partners feel they can build trust to share their most difficult feelings. People with hidden grief often have a string of unhappy relationships that don't end with emotional closure because they simply cannot talk about things when they go wrong."