Squaring up to Your Shynes...
If you suffer with shyness...
When I saw the story today about the giant "billboard revenge" that YaVaughnie Wilkins exacted on ex- lover, the very married Charles Phillips (this story took place Stateside), my first feeling was "go girl!" The audacity of the man having an eight year affair with her and then dumping her.
My next thought was "more fool you getting involved with a married man and believing his lies! But, dammit girl, you sure got that love cheat with those billboards!"
Swiftly followed by my next thought that this is classic revenge that’ll end up feeling bittersweet and not just sweet. Because who is ever going to take YaVaughnie Wilkins seriously again? Possible employers might view her as having poor judgement - having gone out with a married man for eight whole years. Possible lovers might wonder if she's a bit of a bunny boiler and what she'll do if they break up with her. And women aren't going to like her around their men.
Ultimately this revenge is going to cost her!
TODAY’S THOUGHT: yup, it might feel really good when you dump someone in it, who has treated you badly. But when you do this so publicly, you're the one who will pay hard for it. I know because I've heard all sorts of cases of revenge. People have confided to doing quite irrational things to get back an extra. And they almost always find that they're the ones who suffer more from their revenge in the end.
My solution? Get happy, get confident, get successful, and make sure the person who broke your heart knows it. When you can hold your head high because you've moved on and looked after yourself - and done good things - then you can’t get better revenge than that. That's the only way to make sure your revenge is sweet like sugar!
One of my three brothers has arrived from the States to visit for a week. The way I handle houseguests - even family - is to find out in advance anything they need - a tube pass, information about shows, any particular food requirements, etc.. I find it takes the stress out of someone arriving and suddenly asking about ‘this or that’ and needing ‘such and such’.
Got a new camera in the sales so I'm going to finally get some pictures up on site of my two adorable cats - Leo and Tinker - alias "Hoody boy" because he permanently acts like a grumpy adolescent - and alias "Naughty pants" because she has the cutest little furry legs like fluffy pantaloons (she's very fluffy and furry) and she's incredibly naughty (getting into everything she shouldn't) but cute.
Have a great weekend, Pam X
I’m excited that my new book ‘THE LAWS OF SISTERHOOD - The girlfriends’ guide to successful dating and finding the one’ is available to preorder on Amazon.
I hope you find it a unique guide that emphasises how single friends can help each other make the most of the dating scene. As well as containing a vast array of tips and techniques to help you to dating success - everything from the first date, online dating, the signals he gives out through different behaviours, and how to improve your own signals are included.
“Pam’s dating book is inspired and will make you a much more attractive and confident date” Jo Hemmings, Behavioural psychologist and author
My new book The Emotional Eater's Diet is published in the UK on May 15 - I’m very excited as I hope emotional eaters - women or men will find it helpful. Each year 2/3s of people start a diet and 20% start a new diet each month. Yet 95% of diets aren’t successful.
I firmly believe that emotional eating to soothe difficult feelings is the culprit behind most of this failure. My book has a huge range of practical tips/strategies to help understand your emotions and manage your appetite. There are mini-quizes and real case studies.
It’s available to preorder on Amazon. Please remember that food can fuel your energy needs but not your emotional needs. Take care!
I'm delighted that my latest book Sex Academy was endorsed by my fellow self-help author Siski Green who said: "Sex Academy really is THE Bible of sex books. The lessons and lectures cover the A-Z of everything you want to know - from Anal sex to getting Zero sex." I hope you enjoy it!
I was so excited and HAPPY to write this book on happiness covering my 10 unique Happiness Principles. I hope it helps increase your well-being, contentment, and happiness. I've packed it with dozens and dozens of easy-to-use strategies, plus life-changing insights. Based on about five years of collecting case studies and research I hope you'll find it helpful.
My latest sex guide's out - I've gone through thousands of questions people ask me about sex - from why they don't feel desire to how to handle a partner's kinky fetish. Here are the answers plus loads of tricks and techniques. Enjoy!
Discover the relationship between your dreams and your sex- and love-life! Go on a journey of self-discovery in this unique dream book. Case studies, a dream directory, and ‘dreamersises’ help you interpret your dreams.
My research found if a couple's been together more than one year it's unlikely you've tried any new sex tip, trick or technique for at least four months! Rescue's at hand with my 250 hottest sex tips for every aspect of your sex life.
No couple or single can be without this unique, best-selling book containing a vast range of techniques, tricks and tips to turn your lover on. From attracting someone new to recharging your old relationship, Fabulous, explores each of the sexual senses in turn!
No. 1 selling book offering you tons of fantastic sex tips PLUS a new and revolutionary ways of looking at sexual pleasure and ‘problems‘ and how they fit into a person's whole life and relationships.
No. 1 selling sex book covering everything from how your body works to infinite sex tips. The Daily Star said: 'Sinful Sex has something for everyone'
A unique parenting book giving you creative techniques to understand your child better through their dreams and nightmares. These reveal so much about a child that most parents miss out on. Strengthen your parent-child relationship, their confidence and well-being!