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About Me

Thanks for checking out my site - the entire point is free self-help with agony aunt-style advice on lots of topics. That said, no article (in full or in part) may be reprinted or used without my premission.

I work as an agony aunt, life and solutions coach, commentator and writer on sex, relationships, and behaviour.

I hope you'll find the articles & tips useful! I've sorted them into the main areas of: sex, love & relationships, parenting, life coaching, and others.

Please get in touch at 'e-mail me' on my homepage - I'd love to answer every e-mail but as I run my site without assistance and work full-time sadly I can't.

In my work as an agony aunt, solutions coach and writer I've written 14 self-help books, my latest are Sex Academy, How to be a Happy Human and The Emotional Eater's Diet. I'm also...

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...an occasional broadcaster doing a bit of radio & TV.

For over three years I've had a fortnightly online sex and love advice column for the Sun newspaper - please do visit the Sun online - a new column goes live every other Friday full of top tips on sex and love.

Recently I did a fun project as a regular celebrity news/relationships commentator on a small satellite show and I pop up on different TV programmes as an agony aunt and social commentator like This Morning, BBC Breakfast, Loose Women, Sky News, and the spin off Big Brother programmes.

Since 1997 I've presented radio programmes and was over-the-moon to win a Sony radio award when I was at Heart FM London here I presented shows for five years. I then presented for 4 1/2 years on LBC before going freelance. Since then I've presented and 'guested' on a huge number of BBC regional stations inclduing BBC London, Western regions and Surrey and Sussex.

For two years I had a weekly agony slot on Tom Dunne's show on Dublin Newstalk radio as well as a weekly dream analysis slot on George Lamb's previous BBC 6 Music shows.

I've previously worked as a psychologist getting my doctorate in psychology from a London teaching hospital where I researched how to help parents whose children had emotional and/or behavioural problems. I've done a number of other courses in psychology - my BSc Hons in psychology from a London university, MPhil in psychology from the London teaching hospital I received my PhD from + ad hoc counselling-type and self-improvement/life-coaching courses. I'm a Chartered Research, Teaching & Academic psychologist with the BPS.

I have worked with a number of charities and presently am a patron of Kids in the Middle that advises parents who are breaking up on how to help their children during this difficult time.

It's fun writing a weekly 'Love Doc' page for Miss Independent Woman website - check them out here! And I'm starting a new agony column with the Yummy Mummy website.

I also support the fantastic work of Kevin Healey and to his autism bullying campaign as well as being a founding member of Kids in the Middle - a charity that aims to promote awareness in parents who are breaking up and how this can affect their children.

I'm delighted to support Saying Goodbye a  charity supporting and providing national services for those who have suffered a miscarriage, still birth or early years loss. 

No two days are the same and I enjoy fresh challenges and always look for new things to do having written self-help columns and articles for many websites and magazines.

I hope you find the site helpful - it's packed with tips and advice - and more to come. Keep checking in for updates!

Keep happy, keep hopeful, Dr Pam x

p.s My 'loves' include: anything made of chocolate (I'm a complete chocoholic) + music including artists/bands - off the top of my head  and in a completely random order - Foos, Kings of Leon, Royal Blood, Pulled Apart by Horses, Jack White, Mallory Knox, Bloc Party, XX, The Drums, Wild Beasts, Phoenix, Filthy Dukes, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, the Strokes, The Dead Weather, Them Crooked Vultures, Alabama Shakes, Biffy Clyro, Enter Shakari, MGMT, Band of Horses, Arcade Fire, White Lies, Example, Calvin Harris, Mark Ronson, Black Keys, Plan B, MIA, Tinie Tempah, Tinchy Stryder, Dizzee Rascal, JayZ, plus AWOL Nation, TEED, Wretch 32, Angel, Jay James Picton, Kendrick Lamar, Spector, Wolfgang, Ed Sheeran and Liam Bailey, Ben Howard, plus dubstep Magnetic Man, Modestep, Nero and Katy B + so many more... like poptastic (and sometimes guilty) pleasures like The Sugababes, Girls Aloud, Britney, Take That + great books like anything by John Irving, William Boyd, Robert Harris, and Lionel Shriver + travel including places like Peru, Cuba, Cambodia, Thailand and India + films of all genres + lots of other stuff like going to galleries, the theatre + action sports like water skiing, skiing, paragliding, hiking and I've been a black belt in Shotokan Karate for years but haven't been able to train for a few years due to a major accident (not related to Karate).

 

I pop up on different TV programmes like This Morning, BBC Breakfast, Big Brother's Little Brother, GMTV, Loose Women and others. I've presented radio programmes since 1997 and won a Sony radio award when I was at Heart 106.2 FM. Think that's the only award I've ever won - I'm not counting a fashion award I won in high school, for creating an entire outfit out of purple, as quite frankly my fashion sense nowadays could be politely described as "eclectic".
I presently do two weekly radio slots - have been doing Wednesdays on George Lamb's BBC 6 Music show for months, but when he moves to weekends in December I'll be doing contributions to his new shows. Tuesdays on Tom Dunne's show on Dublin Newstalk radio as well as lots of freelancing on various stations - popping up weekly on stations around the country.
I've previously worked as a psychologist getting my doctorate in psychology from a London teaching hospital where I researched how to help parents whose children had emotional and/or behavioural problems. I've done a number of other courses in psychology + counselling-type areas.
No two days are the same as quite frankly I have a low boredom threshold - I need fresh challenges and I'm always looking for new things to do.
I write about love, sex, life - and even celebrities' behaviour - for newspapers like The Express, The Sun, The Times and others, magazines like Love it! and Scarlet plus the 'glossies' like Cosmo, Glamour, Red, Now, More, and so on. Check out my new weekly column on iVillage.co.uk and my regular contributions to MSN.co.uk, as well as the Goodtoknow.co.uk, Men's Health, Orange and GQ websites amongst others. 
I hope you find the site super helpful - it's packed with advice - and more to come. Keep checking in for updates like the little sex tip films I plan plus other interesting things!
Keep happy, Dr Pam x 
p.s My 'loves' include: anything made of chocolate + music including artists/bands (off the top of my head) from Tinchy Stryder, Dizzee Rascal, Kings of Leon, Bloc Party, Wild Beast (v happy to see them on Jools Holland as have never caught them live), Phoenix, Filthy Dukes, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, Foo Fighters, and so many more to pop like my guilty pleasures of The Sugababes, Girls Aloud, Take That + great books like anything by John Irving, William Boyd, and Lionel Shriver + travel including places like Peru, Cuba and India + films of all genres + lots of other stuff like going to galleries, the theatre + action sports - I've been a black belt in Shotokan Karate for years but haven't been able to train for a few years due to a major accident (funny enough not related to Karate). And my biggest loves of all are my hubby and two children.
My 'hates' include...well, I might just keep those to myself!

 

 

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News

In a romance but your boyfriend is in a bromance? Check this TV opportunity...

27/02/2015

This sounds like a fun TV opportunity! If you're in a relationship but your boyfriend is in a bromance it could be for you... Check this link!


Interpreting dreams on Heart FM! Plus 'where’s my sex life gone' – dilemma…

26/02/2015

First thing today I’m interpreting one listener’s recurring dream for the Heart FM Wales breakfast show. Always love looking at the symbolism and potential meaning in a dream.

In my Yummy Mummy Beauty website column I tackle where’s my sex life gone? 

Take care of each other, Pamx

The Bedroom Brit Awards… PLUS gorgeous giveaway!

20/02/2015

To celebrate the Brit Awards next week I’ve done some Bedroom Brit Awards for you in my Sun newspaper online column today.

The basis of all my music-based sex tips is research showing how different music affects our moods… and being ‘in the mood’.

Watch out for a fabulous giveaway of the new Siri 2 vibrator from luxury, intimate lifestyle products company LELO.com. One lucky reader will receive it!

 Happy weekend and I hope my column rocks your world...in the bedroom, Pamx

The worst type of betrayal...

19/02/2015

There is infidelity - and then there's infidelity with your partner's mother. In today's Sun newspaper I've commented and given advice on one woman's tragic story.

How do you move forward when your mother cheated with your fiance? It's a long road to forgiveness.

Take care of yourself, Pam x

My lovely publisher has arranged a book giveaway!

16/02/2015

My publisher New Holland is giving away two copies of my book on emotional eating (check out the upper right-hand corner of my homepage to see my book).

If you go onto my Twitter feed you’ll see all you have to do is retweet the correct Tweet about the competition - and follow - to be in with a chance to win one of the two copies they have to giveaway.

Good luck!

The two winners will be announced Wednesday afternoon - or maybe Thursday morning because my publisher’s head office is in Australia.

Happy Monday, Pamx

Relationship quiz for you plus happy Valentine’s Day!

15/02/2015

The Sun newspaper asked me to write a fun (but still informative with tips) quiz about relationships. So are you a flowers-and-chocolate style lover or Fifty Shades style lover?

Here’s the link, there is advice for each relationship profile - we could all do with a few extra tips to make your relationships as great as possible.

Happy Valentine’s Day and happy weekend, Pamx

Rebuilding trust after terrible abuse…

13/02/2015

A survivor of abuse often feels they have so much taken away from them - self-esteem and confidence, their own sense of personal power, their pride, plus the ability to trust anyone ever again.

In today’s Sun newspaper I’ve commented on one woman’s story of learning to trust again.

TODAY’S TIP: it’s crucial you get help if you’ve been in only abusive relationship. You can find out about local services from your GP, social services, women’s centre, health visitor if you have young children, etc.

Take care and have a great weekend, Pamx

Enjoy your very own Christian Grey but handle with care…

12/02/2015

The best thing about the Fifty Shades phenomenon (whether you loved or loathed the books) is how much people are experimenting in the bedroom. However if you’re going to hook up with a stranger who claims to be a real life Christian Grey I’d advise extreme caution.

People can make all sorts of claims and then not play safely when it comes to BDSM – bondage, domination, sadism, masochism. In today’s Sun newspaper I’ve commented on one story. Check it out – as I said, caution is the word when getting involved with people you don’t know that you can trust.

Take care of yourself, Pamx

Dating Dos and Don’ts for You in the Run-Up to Valentine’s Day…

10/02/2015

Dating can be daunting, frustrating, but also fun and exhilarating. I was given the brief in a short space to provide a few dos and don’ts for first dates, new couples, and established couples.

Check it out in today’s Sun newspaper Valentine special. I’ll post a link later when it goes live on their website.

TODAY’S TIP: One of the simplest but most important tips of all is to remember on that first date (or even the second, third and fourth date) that they are as nervous as you. Nerves are to be expected. When you put it into perspective that you both feel that way, you can start to relax. It’s all going to be fine.

Happy dating, Pamx

Fifty Shades statistics show that women want to… Plus GIVEAWAY! And inspiration...

06/02/2015

Fifty Shades of Grey is hitting cinemas next week - only time will tell if it’s an erotic romp worthy of its 18 certificate or if it has as much sexual energy as a vibrator whose batteries are flagging.

To make sure things don’t flag for you in the bedroom I’ve got lots of tips in my column in today’s Sun newspaper online that can inspire some fantasy fun. I'm calling it Fifty Shades of Great Sex!

I also have a completely gorgeous giveaway for two lucky readers from luxury vibrator maker LELO.

Also check out the stats from an Ann Summers survey that shows 80% of women want to take control in the bedroom… that’s a lot of dominatrices sees in the making.

Also in today's Sun I comment on one woman's extraordinary story of surviving a fireball and going on to find her relationship became stronger. Do check it out – it's such an inspirational story. 

Back to the sex column – have fun with the tips when I post it later on and good luck with the giveaway!

I always aim to make it a happy weekend for you, Pamx

Books

The Emotional Eater's Diet

My new book The Emotional Eater's Diet is published in the UK on May 15 - I’m very excited as I hope emotional eaters - women or men will find it helpful. Each year 2/3s of people start a diet and 20% start a new diet each month. Yet 95% of diets aren’t successful.

I firmly believe that emotional eating to soothe difficult feelings is the culprit behind most of this failure. My book has a huge range of practical tips/strategies to help understand your emotions and manage your appetite. There are mini-quizes and real case studies.

It’s available to preorder on Amazon. Please remember that food can fuel your energy needs but not your emotional needs. Take care!


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Sex Academy - Essential Lessons in Seduction & Spectacular Sex

I'm delighted that my latest book Sex Academy was endorsed by my fellow self-help author Siski Green who said: "Sex Academy really is THE Bible of sex books. The lessons and lectures cover the A-Z of everything you want to know - from Anal sex to getting Zero sex." I hope you enjoy it!


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How to be a Happy Human - Ten Essential Principles to Change Your Life!

I was so excited and HAPPY to write this book on happiness covering my 10 unique Happiness Principles. I hope it helps increase your well-being, contentment, and happiness. I've packed it with dozens and dozens of easy-to-use strategies, plus life-changing insights. Based on about five years of collecting case studies and research I hope you'll find it helpful.


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Steamy Sex - The Sex Doctor's Answers For Keeping It Hot

My latest sex guide's out - I've gone through thousands of questions people ask me about sex - from why they don't feel desire to how to handle a partner's kinky fetish. Here are the answers plus loads of tricks and techniques. Enjoy!


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Sex Dreams & Symbols

Discover the relationship between your dreams and your sex- and love-life! Go on a journey of self-discovery in this unique dream book. Case studies, a dream directory, and ‘dreamersises’ help you interpret your dreams.


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Sizzling Sex - The Sex Doctor's 250 Hottest Tips, Tricks, and Techniques

My research found if a couple's been together more than one year it's unlikely you've tried any new sex tip, trick or technique for at least four months! Rescue's at hand with my 250 hottest sex tips for every aspect of your sex life.


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The Dating Survival Guide - Ten Top Tactics For Total Success

Dating. It's a jungle out there. This is the ultimate guide to negotiating your way around the minefield of the dating game. Practical advice, useful tips and insights cover all dating issues to revolutionise your love life!

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The Break-up Survival Kit - Emotional Rescue For The Newly Single!

Relationship breakdown's rife and the emotional fall-out from a break-up is incalculable. Here's emotional rescue for the heartbroken packed with tips, advice, plus practical assistance allowing the broken-hearted to rebuild their lives.

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Fabulous Foreplay - The Sex Doctor's Guide To Teasing & Pleasing Your Lover

No couple or single can be without this unique, best-selling book containing a vast range of techniques, tricks and tips to turn your lover on. From attracting someone new to recharging your old relationship, Fabulous, explores each of the sexual senses in turn!


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Sensational Sex: The Revolutionary Guide To Sexual Pleasure & Fulfilment

No. 1 selling book offering you tons of fantastic sex tips PLUS a new and revolutionary ways of looking at sexual pleasure and ‘problems‘ and how they fit into a person's whole life and relationships.


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Sinful Sex: The Uninhibited Guide to Erotic Pleasure

No. 1 selling sex book covering everything from how your body works to infinite sex tips. The Daily Star said: 'Sinful Sex has something for everyone'


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Your Child's Dreams

A unique parenting book giving you creative techniques to understand your child better through their dreams and nightmares.  These reveal so much about a child that most parents miss out on. Strengthen your parent-child relationship, their confidence and well-being!


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