Squaring up to Your Shynes...
If you suffer with shyness...
First kiss - Be confident about it, if she's giving you flirty signs she definitely wants a first kiss. Move in lowly - never lunge! At the very worst if she wasn't ready for a first kiss, if you've done it with confidence and gently she won't be offended.
First time back to yours - Don't try it on too quickly the minute she walks in your door. Surprise her and show her that "coffee" actually means coffee. She'll appreciate the difference between that approach and the one most women get when they first go over to his. Also it doesn't have to be immaculate but make sure your flat is presentable. It’ll definitely turn her off to see a mountain of dishes or dirty socks strewn everywhere.
First sober sex - She may feel just as nervous as you do. Again this is the time to take it slowly and don't rush! As you begin with a bit of sex-play keep asking her what feels good. The more you let her know that you're interested in giving her a fabulous time, the more relaxed she'll feel. That’ll make a better sober-sex experience for you both.
First meeting her mates - Remember gal-pals are quite protective of each other so your best behaviour is important. Show an interest in each of her mates not just the foxy ones! To take the inevitable spotlight that's going to be on you off f you, keep asking them the questions.
First holiday together - to make it a happy experience discuss well in advance what your expectations are. Does she want to lounge on the beach with a book when you want to learn to scuba? By sorting out your expectations beforehand you can compromise and make it the holiday of a lifetime.
First shopping trip together - Allow plenty of and fuelled with food and coffee so you don't flag. But if you truly hate shopping let her know beforehand not when you've arrived at a massive shopping mall. Let her know you're happy to shop for a maximum of two hours in this case and then stick to it. She needs to stick to it to!
First time she cries - don't be frightened it's only tears! The biggest mistake men make is going quiet because they don't know what to do. Put your arm around her and say simply that when she's ready to tell you what's wrong you'll be listening. A hug and just having your ear is a fantastic starting point for sorting it out.
First time she gets moody with you - don't perpetuate the cycle and get moody back. Best to tactfully but firmly say you know something's up and you want to get the bottom of it and you're prepared to wait until she wants to talk.
First time she says I love you - don't splutter something inane like, "gosh, how surprising." If you're not ready to tell her you love her back (because you're not sure if you do) tell her how good it is to hear and that you care for her very much. You can also say what it is that you like about her so much. Be specific! It's really her problem if she's embarrassed because you haven't reached the love stage yet but you don't have to add insult to injury.
Quotes for Men's Health
I’m excited that my new book ‘THE LAWS OF SISTERHOOD - The girlfriends’ guide to successful dating and finding the one’ is available to preorder on Amazon.
I hope you find it a unique guide that emphasises how single friends can help each other make the most of the dating scene. As well as containing a vast array of tips and techniques to help you to dating success - everything from the first date, online dating, the signals he gives out through different behaviours, and how to improve your own signals are included.
“Pam’s dating book is inspired and will make you a much more attractive and confident date” Jo Hemmings, Behavioural psychologist and author
My new book The Emotional Eater's Diet is published in the UK on May 15 - I’m very excited as I hope emotional eaters - women or men will find it helpful. Each year 2/3s of people start a diet and 20% start a new diet each month. Yet 95% of diets aren’t successful.
I firmly believe that emotional eating to soothe difficult feelings is the culprit behind most of this failure. My book has a huge range of practical tips/strategies to help understand your emotions and manage your appetite. There are mini-quizes and real case studies.
It’s available to preorder on Amazon. Please remember that food can fuel your energy needs but not your emotional needs. Take care!
I'm delighted that my latest book Sex Academy was endorsed by my fellow self-help author Siski Green who said: "Sex Academy really is THE Bible of sex books. The lessons and lectures cover the A-Z of everything you want to know - from Anal sex to getting Zero sex." I hope you enjoy it!
I was so excited and HAPPY to write this book on happiness covering my 10 unique Happiness Principles. I hope it helps increase your well-being, contentment, and happiness. I've packed it with dozens and dozens of easy-to-use strategies, plus life-changing insights. Based on about five years of collecting case studies and research I hope you'll find it helpful.
My latest sex guide's out - I've gone through thousands of questions people ask me about sex - from why they don't feel desire to how to handle a partner's kinky fetish. Here are the answers plus loads of tricks and techniques. Enjoy!
Discover the relationship between your dreams and your sex- and love-life! Go on a journey of self-discovery in this unique dream book. Case studies, a dream directory, and ‘dreamersises’ help you interpret your dreams.
My research found if a couple's been together more than one year it's unlikely you've tried any new sex tip, trick or technique for at least four months! Rescue's at hand with my 250 hottest sex tips for every aspect of your sex life.
No couple or single can be without this unique, best-selling book containing a vast range of techniques, tricks and tips to turn your lover on. From attracting someone new to recharging your old relationship, Fabulous, explores each of the sexual senses in turn!
No. 1 selling book offering you tons of fantastic sex tips PLUS a new and revolutionary ways of looking at sexual pleasure and ‘problems‘ and how they fit into a person's whole life and relationships.
No. 1 selling sex book covering everything from how your body works to infinite sex tips. The Daily Star said: 'Sinful Sex has something for everyone'
A unique parenting book giving you creative techniques to understand your child better through their dreams and nightmares. These reveal so much about a child that most parents miss out on. Strengthen your parent-child relationship, their confidence and well-being!