Squaring up to Your Shynes...
If you suffer with shyness...
If you're looking for new love - you've come to the right place! Being happy and single is a wonderful state of mind but if you’re ready to share your life, or simply have the best possible fun dating then take this quiz. You need to find out a little bit about your romantic self .
Take my "love profile" quiz to identify your essential romantic self, what sort of men you're attracted to, and what sort of men you should be attracted to!
1/ In a fantasy world who would you like to have a relationship with?
A) Daniel Craig
B) Colin Farrell
C) Tom Hanks
2/ The most important attribute a potential partner should have is?
A) to be romantic
B) to be exciting
C) to be kind/friendly
3/ Your top choice of date would be?
A) dining in a candlelit restaurant
B) pubbing and clubbing
C) sharing a film and pop corn
4/ How are you most likely to attract a man?
A) by playing hard to get
B) by being unpredictable
C) by being friendly
5/ Friends are most likely to tell you -
A) you set your expectations too high with men
B) you set your expectations too low with men
C) your expectations of men are uncomplicated
6/ When getting sexy, what would you prefer?
A) a sensual massage and foreplay by candlelight
B) a quickie somewhere daring
C) sex in an easy to do and comfortable position
7/ The most important thing a man can provide a relationship is -
A) strength and backbone
B) sexual chemistry
8/ Who should make the first move?
A) definitely the man
B) either person as long as some thing’s kick-started
C) both should show mutual interest
9/ What do you want most from a long-term relationship?
A) a soulmate
B) an action man
C) an equal partner
10/ What’s your typical reaction to a boyfriend having a problem?
A) encourage him to share it with a male friend
B) if I must, I'll help him
C) be a shoulder to cry on
11/ Which would be the most likely reason a man would finish with you?
A) I'm too mysterious
B) I'm too demanding
C) I'm too much like his sister/friend
12/ How do you know when your feelings are serious?
A) when I feel adored and "romanced"
B) if I obsess over him
C) when I can talk to him about anything
Love Profile Guide:
7+ As = You're A "True Romantic"
You've a strong desire to be cherished. You long for things to go smoothly. You conduct your relationships in an old-fashioned way where he has to chase you - and you have to remain mysterious. Your other traits include trying to make things "perfect" in a relationship. Very high expectations of what a relationship should be like. You're also sensual and thoughtful but only once he's proved himself. Relationships may well have disappointed you.
Men you're attracted to –The classic strong, silent type. The "Mr Big type" from Sex and the City. Men who outwardly know how to wine and dine someone. A man that’s skilled at making you feel attractive and desirable and who on the surface appears to "look after" you. One that helps you live your fantasy that everything is "perfect". It's time to realise that things are never perfect! But less than perfect can be more interesting in the long run. Such men can be shallow because on the surface they do everything right and are polished at, e.g., opening doors and helping you into cars - but they may not be interested in the inner you.
Men you should be attracted to - A man who is both romantic and also able to discuss his feelings. You’ll always love the “hearts and flowers” of romantic gestures. However, as a relationship deepens you’ll become frustrated if he remains a dark horse - always silent but maybe not so strong. This might’ve prevented relationships developing fully in the past for you - the fact that you hadn't recognised that you need more than a uni-dimensional Cadbury's Milk Tray man. Time to recognise that strength can come from a man being able to share his innermost thoughts, concerns and issues. That's not a sign of weakness! It's also time to learn that you can look after yourself.
7+ Bs =You're A "Passion Addict"
You live a life of very high peaks and very low troughs - not only in relationships but right across the board. If a man doesn't both excite you and test you, you get bored quickly. You're a natural risk-taker who sometimes doesn't recognise a risk-too-far when it comes to men. You expect a relationship to be exciting, passionate and highly sexed. Underneath your good-time girl exterior pounds a very big heart. It's been broken before and it's time to protect it.
Men you're attracted to – Men who tend to treat you mean to keep you keen - and it works for them! Think of sex addict "Phil Hunter" in ITV's The Bill. Often you go for sexual chemistry and physical attractiveness over substantial personal qualities. These men may well give you a good time in bed. But men with bags of sexual chemistry and little depth tend to use women like you. It's fun at first to but that often does it last for long.
Men you should be attracted to - A happy medium between a man who's not a pushover - and so doesn't bore you - but also not a "player" whose only after one thing. These men exist - they can be both interesting and fun but they won’t take advantage of your vulnerabilities. Not only would such a man show you that the roller-coaster ride doesn't have to be quite so drastic but there's more to you then your excitable risk-taking side.
7+ Cs = You're A "Girl Next Door"
Good-natured and dedicated you offer – and look for - security in a relationship. You place old-fashioned qualities like kindness and thoughtfulness above all others. You can be quite naive when it comes to judging someone's character because you always try and see the positive in someone. Your expectations in terms of lust, passion and excitement are low and some might see you as a little bit too predictable and fair-minded. Some relationships in the past may have floundered because you were simply too nice.
Men you're attracted to – Steady and reliable men - think of the "Bradley type" in Eastenders. They're looking for a friend as much as a partner. They'll be kind and nice to you but may also lack confidence and the ability to take control from time to time. No matter how good the quality of relationship the power balance does tend to shift depending on circumstances so it's important that a man can take his share of responsibility. You do risk your relationship being almost completely platonic. And even you could get fed up and long for more.
Men you should be attracted to – Definitely a man with the good qualities you like but also those who aren't threatened by life. Men who want an equal partnership and the stability you enjoy but also those with the zest to enjoy life to the full. And a man who can be good-hearted but not timid. That way you can both grow together and build on each other's strengths.
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I hope you find it a unique guide that emphasises how single friends can help each other make the most of the dating scene. As well as containing a vast array of tips and techniques to help you to dating success - everything from the first date, online dating, the signals he gives out through different behaviours, and how to improve your own signals are included.
“Pam’s dating book is inspired and will make you a much more attractive and confident date” Jo Hemmings, Behavioural psychologist and author
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I firmly believe that emotional eating to soothe difficult feelings is the culprit behind most of this failure. My book has a huge range of practical tips/strategies to help understand your emotions and manage your appetite. There are mini-quizes and real case studies.
It’s available to preorder on Amazon. Please remember that food can fuel your energy needs but not your emotional needs. Take care!
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